once upon a diirrty time, i lived in a share house with a couple of other guys. we were typical beer drinkin’, pizza eatin’, bong smokin’ guys. one day, i was home alone and the phone rang. it was the girlfriend of one of my housemates. i didn’t really like her much, but she was polite and friendly. i probably would have fucked her if i was drunk and didn’t have any better offers, but i would never have persued her. anyway, i don’t remember much about what we talked about, but i do remember closing my eyes and masturbating. i remember her saying, “bless you” when i came. to this day, i’m not sure if she mistakingly thought i sneezed, or if she knew what i was up to and needed a blessing anyway.